Napoleon Dynamite and Pedro

A Napoleon Dynamite was walking down the sidewalk one day when his friend, Pedro, rode up on an incredible shiny new bicycle. The Napoleon was stunned by his friend’s sweet ride and asked, “WOW! Where did you get such a nice bike?” Pedro replied, “Well, yesterday I was walking home, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ‘Take what you want!'” Napoleon nodded approvingly, “Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”


Tandem Riders

A tandem rider is stopped by a police car. “What’ve I done, officer?” asks the rider. “Perhaps you didn’t notice sir, but your wife fell off your bike half a mile back . . .” “Oh, thank God for that,” says the rider – “I thought I’d gone deaf!”

Two Nuns

Two Nuns were riding a tandem along Acorn Street in Boston, Massachusetts. The Nun on the back seat (the stoker) remarked “I’ve never come this way before” The reply “Must be the cobble stones” Old Lady An old woman was discussing burial arrangements for her husband and she told the funeral director, I want my husband buried with his behind sticking up out of the ground. The director asked her why and she said…”that’s so, when I ride out to visit his site, I’ll have a place to park my bicycle!

Dear God

“Dear God. If there is such a thing as reincarnation, then please may I return as a ladies bicycle seat”